Turd of the Week (2002)






118 Jan 5 Position Vacant
119 Jan 12 Major League Soccer minor league Shot through the heart, and you’re to blame, you give soccer a bad name.
120 Jan 19 Joe Machnik &
Trey Fitz-Gerald
MLS Flunkies UltraSpammers
121 Jan 26 Tim-MAY! Krause Would-be Ken Whoreowitz Still trying to shove MLS down Milwaukee’s throat
122 Feb 2 Jorge Avilez Perez puta cobarde Stabbing a referee
123 Feb 9 Mali Police Hooligans Beating a coach
124 Feb 16 Don Garber MLS President Lying, tap-dancing, distorting, evading, prevaricating and equivocating
125 Feb 23 Tim-MAY! Krause Fading MLS franchisee Can’t even afford chump change
126 Mar 9 Premier Soccer Productions Soccer promoter Making boxing promoters look honest
127 Mar 16 Italian Police Thugs Causing a police riot
128 Mar 27 Hertha Berlin Supporters Boo birds Riding a lame horse
129 Apr 6 jmeissen0 Unfunny guy trying to be funny Giving TotW a collective coronary
130 Apr 13 Sepp Blatter Impotent FIFA potentate Cancelling audit of shady finances
131 Apr 20 Jack Warner &
Chuck Blazer
Blatter lap dogs Trying to quash investigation
132 May 4 Fabián Hernan Santa Cruz Banfield midfielder Stinky finger
133 May 18 Sepp Blatter Impotent FIFA potentate Stonewalling
134 June 8 Everyone Who Voted for Sepp Blatter Prostitutes Voting for Sepp Blatter (and giving prostitutes a bad name)
135 June 15 Portugal Graceless losers Losing gracelessly
136 June 22 Mexico Graceless losers Losing gracelessly
137 June 29 San Francisco Police Elliot Ness wannabes Violating the Constitution
138 July 6 Turd of the Week Internet soccer rag Worst prediction since “WorldCom stock will keep going up”
139 July 13 Position Vacant
140 July 27 Ivan Gazidis MLS personnel Czar Cheaper than a two-dollar suit
141 Aug 10 Louis Van Gaal über Coach Knowing how to win better than someone who actually has won
142 Aug 17 CoreComm / Voyager.net merger reductio ad absurdum Service that sucks harder than Seka with 14″ of John Holmes in her throat
143 Aug 31 Michael Kennedy Referee Endangering thousands of lives
144 Sept 14 Roy Keane Repeat offender Aggravated assault
145 Sept 28 CoreComm / Voyager.net Pathetic excuse for an ISP Changing the name of “my” web site
146 Oct 5 Costa Rica Football Federation Morons What the hell were they thinking!?
147 Oct 19 Major League Soccer Rule fiddlers Staining the reputation of every referee in the league
148 Oct 26 People of Columbus Erstwhile Crew supporters Staying home to watch Must See TV
149 Nov 9 Ratsimandresy Ratsarazaka Stade Olympique l’Emyrne coach Throwing a world-class hissy fit
150 Nov 23 Debbie Keller Former semi-decent player Still suing after all these years

2002 Turd of the Year