Turd of the Week #8

Debbie Keller fails to make the TotW dishonor roll for the third straight week, though one wonders how long she will be out:

U.S. Women: DiCicco names roster for Algarve Cup

Mar 8, 1999

U.S. women’s national team coach Tony DiCicco has announced his 18-woman
roster that will depart for Portugal on March 9 to compete in the 6th Algarve
Cup, the eight-team international tournament held on the coast in the Southern
tip of the country.

Absent from the roster is forward Debbie Keller, who filed an arbitration
action concerning her national team status last week. She had been invited to
train with the team in Florida for the week prior to the departure for

Can another lawsuit be far behind?

Rumor Control had a juicy tidbit regarding further Sampsonite stupidity, but without confirmatory rumors from a more mainstream rumor mill, like CBS Sportsline or Soccer Times, even I can’t find it within myself to elect even so eminently qualified a turd as Steve Sampson as this week’s TotW. The rumor may still prove to be true — afterall, where it stinks, there’s crap.

FIFA is just too easy a target and have already gathered several recent TotW dishonorable mentions for their devolvement of the game, still it bears witnessing that this week they — and their sycophantic minions at the national associations — agreed to expand next year’s two-referee experiment from one major European league to many.

MLS Slips Latin Players the Big Tamale? LA Galaxy midfield maestro Mauricio Cienfuegos and fellow Salvadoran, SJ Clash forward Raul Diaz Arce, are holding out increased for wages. Both earn a little over $100,000 per year — only slightly more than a midtable English forward spends on a date with the Spice Girls. MLS refuses to give in to their wage demands, citing existing contracts with the pair. Valid point, but both are worth much more than they are making, and MLS is cutting off its nose to spite its face over what is pennies even to its impoverished self. To make matters worse, league propagandists are claiming the Galaxy’s unproven midfield quartet somehow will make up for Cien’s abscence. (We do not even need to mention how the Clash will continue to suck with out Diaz Arce.) Sorry MLS, you can’t pin this one on Sunil: You dingleberries* jobbed him two weeks ago, so now you only have your own flinty skins to blame.

Btw, is it just me or does Clash coach Brian Quinn look like the long-lost twin of David Bowie?

Dingleberry (n): A small turd.


Blatter Proposes Moving Easter to July


ZURICH, March 12 (Reuters) – The soccer season in every
country in the world will run in one calendar year from February
to November if a proposal announced by world soccer’s governing
body FIFA on Friday is adopted.

The change would affect big soccer nations such as Italy,
England, Germany and Spain, as well as the smallest and would
affect all traditional tournaments such as the English F.A. Cup
Final and the European Cup Final which have been played in the
spring since their inception.

FIFA also wants the top division in every country cut to 16
teams by 2005 to make the new “harmonized” system work. A FIFA
spokesman said: “It will be difficult but they have to make an

“Everyone has to sacrifice a little,” said FIFA president
Sepp Blatter.

Comrade Blatter would have done well as a Central Party apparatchik: Living in the lap of luxury while extolling the virtues of self-sacrifice to some poor Ivan who scrapes and saves to put two rubles together to buy a bottle of bootleg vodka and then sends him to the Gulag for re-education when he fails to live in harmony with the People’s Paradise. Literally inverting the entire World football season is a little … task? What next, Saint Sepp parts the English Channel, multiplies the pies and the pints, and still has time left before breakfast to bring peace to Northern Ireland, the Balkans and the Middle East?

For proposing yet another crap idea (it seems he has one about as often as I fart), and insisting it is no big deal:

Sepp Blatter

Turd of the Week

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