First, the dishonorable mentions:
Moron of the Week goes to Diego Simeone, who’s crime occured eight months ago:
MILAN, March 2 (Reuters) – Argentina captain Diego Simeone has admitted he
took a fall to fool the referee when he was kicked by David Beckham in last
year’s World Cup and the England player was sent off.
The World Cup incident occurred two minutes into the second half of the
second round clash in St Etienne on June 30, with the score at 2-2.
Argentina went on to win on penalties after extra-time.
Diego (is there something about Argentine players named ‘Diego’ that guarantees they will be boors and cheats?) is a moron on several levels: First, Simeone confessed his criminality the day before his club Inter Milan met Beckham’s Man U in the European Cup quarter-finals. Second, he taunted referees everywhere by further boasting that “Clearly I was clever …” This virtually guarantees that Beckham will have open season on Simeone, should he so choose, and also virtually guarantees that Simeone will never, ever, again get a borderline call in his favor. Diego Simeone, Moron of the Week.
had a goal disallowed for a foul off the ball … Oh, sweet!
Now, for our feature presentation:
Lawyers’ Wet Dream: Debbie Keller
Despite invitation to camp, Keller files for arbitration of USSF compliant
> WASHINGTON, D.C, (Friday, February 26, 1999) — Forward Debbie Keller, not
> invited to the United States women’s residency camp in January despite
> being the team’s second leading goal-scorer last year, filed a complaint
> with the American Arbitration Association today, seeking to be restored to
> the roster.
This scary woman is one who plainly will never be satisfied. Drap her in gold and precious jewels, dine her with rare and succulent cuisine, house her in marbled palaces, attend to her with muscular Nubian eunuchs waving palm fronds, start her in every US national team game (all ages & levels, and both genders) from now until she croaks (even when she is in a wheelchair, drooling oatmeal and pooping her Depends) and she still won’t be happy! Trouble, they name is Deborah. Woe be the coach who gave Keller her first game, for she hath troubled every coach in every land since. If her petulance causes the US to lose WWC’99, she will join Steve Sampson as Turds Emertii.
Turd of the Week